This is the first of five installments focusing on the tenets of Taekwondo: courtesy, integrity, perseverance, self-control, and indomitable spirit. A good Taekwondo school will insist that its students exemplify all these traits. Understanding the meaning and purpose of each tenet is key to becoming a martial artist in both mind and body.
Before beginning to write this post, I took a few minutes to gather my thoughts about why anyone would want to read an article on courtesy. It seems to be such an irrelevant topic in this day of social media and electronic relationships. For example, entire businesses can exist with people-to-people interactions kept to an astonishing minimum, which begs the question: why do we need to talk about (think about, or even display) a courteous mindset? Perhaps more importantly, do we really need to spend time developing this tenet as a personal goal, both inside and outside the Taekwondo dojang? Of course, the answer is yes, but let’s dig in a bit more.
Courtesy Defined
Almost every definition I looked at included the word “polite.” Being polite necessarily requires the use of words such as “please,” “thank you,” “pardon me,” and “you’re welcome” in everyday life. However, a definition of courtesy may also include words and phrases such as “respect” and “consideration for others.” I’m constantly amazed that the practice of a combat sport such as Taekwondo focuses so much on something as non-combative as being polite, respectful, and considerate. However, therein lies one of the most attractive and compelling traits of the martial arts—a desire to improve the world via strength tempered with basic decency. Courtesy (as defined above) as the first tenet of Taekwondo is no accident.
Courtesy is the Visible Manifestation of Integrity
I believe there is a good reason that courtesy is usually listed first when someone is asked to recite the 5 tenets of Taekwondo. A courteous person is outwardly expressing the other 4 tenets of Taekwondo. Courtesy is the soft blanket that allows another person to receive the (sometimes difficult) honesty that comes with integrity. In this way, each Taekwondo tenet leads to the next, with integrity leading to perseverance, which leads to self-control, which leads to an indomitable spirit. I am reminded of Romans 5 verse 4, which says “endurance produces character, and character produces hope.” It makes sense that a hopeful person, one of great character, will also be courteous.
Courtesy is a Requirement for Demonstrating Respect
While courtesy is the outward demonstration of integrity, it also shows respect and confers dignity and value to those who receive it. This, in turn, improves relationships, communication, and understanding. Older martial artists can be indispensable role models for the children under their tutelage when they practice simple courtesy. Of course, the ability to be courteous to an opponent, both on and off the mat, requires integrity, perseverance, self-control, and an indomitable spirit. I love that while being courteous is likely the simplest of the 5 tenets, it is also the hallmark of a martial artist who takes the other 4 tenets seriously. The British School of Excellence states that (common) courtesy “[acknowledges] the inherent worth of every individual.”
Politeness. Respect. Consideration for others. These are all things we need more of in this world.
I’m curious how other martial artists think about courtesy. Feel free to leave a comment below.